During the lockdowns and craziness of the 2020 COVID pandemic, my husband and I decided to take a radical and life-altering approach to recover from burnout. With both of us experiencing career burnout and still going through the emotional upheaval of years of infertility and loss, and then deciding to abandon adoption, we needed a complete life change. Some would call it a mid-life crisis; I call it a mid-life reset. It was time to re-Kindle old dreams and create a new path forward. I don’t recommend this radical approach for everyone, but in some situations, it’s better to “burn the ships” and start over.
Early in March 2020, we made the decision to move out of suburban Denver knowing that part of our burnout was related to big-city issues such as long commutes in heavy traffic and the general “busyness” of city life. We started throwing around ideas about buying rental property and running several B&Bs, buying a campground in a mountain location, or starting a retreat center (which we had talked about off and on since we were married as a “someday” dream). However, we couldn’t decide on where we wanted to move. We took an exploratory 3-week trip to Northern Idaho to a location that we thought might be “it.” But after spending three weeks there we really didn’t feel a connection. As we talked more and more, we realized we had no idea where we wanted to move so we somewhat jokingly brought up the idea of selling our house and living in our 5th wheel for a few months so we could go check out a few places. BINGO! That was it – well sort of!
As we started thinking about the RV lifestyle and started watching Youtubers who were full-time RV’rs we started thinking maybe we could do that for a few months until we figured out where to move permanently. My husband would take a short sabbatical and I would keep working until we settled on a new location and we both got new jobs. As 2020 went on, it became apparent that our house was worth a lot more than we had paid for it. So we started talking about at least a year of full-time RVing with both of us taking a sabbatical. In November 2020, we were able to trade in our current fifth wheel for a 36-foot Motorhome that was much more appropriate for full-time RV living. At that point, we committed to our decision to sell our house, get rid of most of our belongings, and start a full-time RV lifestyle. The next year was spent prepping for this change and before we knew it, it was December 2021 and we walked out of our house for the last time and into a completely different life!
My husband and I had a different burnout recovery path even though we were both on a year-long RV sabbatical. I needed to spend time learning, reading, thinking, and healing in nature. We avoided big cities and as we traveled through Texas and Arkansas in the first few months and started checking some things off our bucket list. We visited the Alamo and the River Walk in San Antonio, we explored the wild beauty of the Texas Hill Country and we dug for diamonds in Arkansas. We played disc golf (OK, Brian played it and I just played AT it!) and played with our one-year-old puppy who was having a great time exploring! Over the summer months, we headed to the Great Lakes and spent a summer having fun in the water and sun (and an episode of poison ivy which was not so fun!). I am the dog walker, so I hiked all over with our two Shiba Inus. We typically walked between 3 and 5 miles every day, and for me, this was the best possible therapy. I’ve always known that my best thoughts come when I have tennis shoes on! I was able to think, reflect and process the burnout I had experienced and was finally able to come to terms with my own mindset and beliefs that led to burnout.
We often blame our company or life circumstances for burnout, but we are responsible for a big part of it! As I reflected on my work and life experiences, I could honestly say that I worked for great bosses and had wonderful colleagues. All of them would have been supportive if I had established better work boundaries in order to pursue having a family while I was still physically/emotionally able to. I had chosen the right career path in the medical field and enjoyed all the positions I worked in. It’s true that work culture played a part in my burnout (which is often the case in healthcare), but it was my responsibility to set the right priorities in life and stick to them. In the end, no career is worth giving up friends, family, and health. While our workplaces are not off the hook in the burnout scenario, we can only start healing when we take responsibility for our own lives.
We are blessed to live in the United States where we have so much freedom, but sometimes we let the culture determine what our lives should look like and fail to truly embrace that freedom. My theme for 2022 during our sabbatical year was “freedom” and I gave myself permission to think about what I wanted our lives to look like moving forward. I found my energy and excitement for life returning. I was able to cut my acid-reducer medications in half so I’m now on a normal dose and have already started slowly weaning off it entirely. With time to cook healthy meals and daily 3-5 mile walks my gallbladder rarely bothers me now. Physical, emotional and mental healing have all occurred during our sabbatical year. While we are not entirely sure what the next 5 years will look like, my husband and I are starting to see foggy dreams become clear and for the first time in our lives, we don’t have “someday, maybe” thoughts but true hope of dreams coming true every day. We are not just recovering from burnout, we are building a new life built on our unique vision, desires, and talents!
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